My Zion

For years I have had this concept in my head which I now call My Zion. It is an idea that any place you are can be Zion if you choose to make it so. It really started with my first extended visit to Zion Canyon. I fell in love and cannot get enough of that place, not during tourist season when it is a zoo but in the quiet times between October 1st and April 1st when the shuttles stop running and the people are less numerous. It is a place where I find unparalleled beauty and quiet stillness that nourishes me.

I love all the changes. Every day, every hour, almost every minute is sooooo different there. The light is continuously changing almost to the point that you can chase it. In February there is water coursing down every little gully and over every rock face, sometimes in torrents.. In April it can be all dried up and look totally different. The colors can show up in the softest, gentlest way and become totally intense in another place. They can differ within just a few feet, bright white juxtaposed by deepest black and softest greens against brilliant orange.

Isn't that the way life is? One day everything is in an uproar and the next can be tranquil. In my Zion, which is not just a physical place but a place in my head, I can make the best or the worst of it. My choice. Pursuing "My Zion" has become something of a passion for me. It is a vision quest of sorts to try and improve my point of view on everything in every day. Sometimes I succeed and pat myself on the back. Sometimes I fail miserably but now I don't continue to beat myself up as in the past. Each day I am trying to become just a little bit better in "My Zion".

On Change and Changing

I used to think of change as another four letter word, just as most of you do. Well, I think Tai Chi and age brought about a great change in my thinking. I have begun to look at change as a very positive thing. I have had to make some mighty changes in thinking in my life. Some of those changes have included actual physical changes but all of them have included changes in heart and mind. I have learned along the way to trust and that has perhaps been the mightiest change of all. I know it is the change that has brought me the most peace.

When I was a kid, I trusted very few people. I was trying to find my way in a world which didn't feel very comfortable to me. Until I was 16 or so, I had many experiences in which I would feel like I was living in a dream and I would awaken at any moment and find that I was back "home" again in the "real" world. It has been a very interesting experience for me to finally get to a place where I accept where I am and trust my Heavenly Father to guide me to where He needs me rather than my trying to push my will upon Him. What great peace this has brought to my life.

The difficulties haven't changed one little bit. There are still many challenges. Like the old saying, "Growing old is not for sissies." On the other hand, growing old can be one of the most rewarding experiences imaginable. I wouldn't change the new understanding I have of life for anything else in the world. I have become what I am through the changes I have decided to make or have been forced to make throughout this life and I am really beginning to like what I am becoming.