Feeling Safe

Well, what an interesting 10 days we've had.  I have written about Bill and not becoming bitter.  My "last straw" test was Friday night when our house was broken into.  That is what I wanted to write about.  I am not doing a recap, that will follow later.  I am doing a piece for and about you, my friends and family and about my feelings.

I have had a great deal of time to think this over.  In fact, that is about all I have done the last 24 hours.  I have gone through the whole range of emotions that someone has in this kind of situation.  I have had disbelief from the moment I walked in the door until now.  I have been angry but that has passed for the time being.  Something in a prayer Ken said which originally came from his Mission President has gone over and over through my head.  Ken said' "Thank Thee Father, that I was not the one doing this awful thing!"  President Rasmussen always talked about how we should be grateful that we do not find ourselves in situations where we have to resort to such terrible things to make our world work.

I don't know who broke into my house and probably never will.  I have not yet forgiven him but I can't help think of the terrible gremlins he must have in his life that would cause him to do something like this.  Our house is full of pictures of the Savior and my children.  This man did everything he did in the face of those I hold most dear but he probably didn't even notice.  After all, they are only pictures or statues and they didn't really feel did they?  Yes, they did!  Everyone I know has been touched by this invasion in some way.

To all of you, please do not live your lives in fear.  I am not and neither should you.  Yes, someone came into my home uninvited but I am safe.  He came while no one was home, most probably because he didn't want to deal the consequences of facing someone.  He did not want to be seen or hurt and I choose to think he did not want to hurt anyone.  His "wants" are important too but we seldom think of those.  He did this to feed his "needs".

The police think he broke in only to get money, probably to support an addiction.  He took nothing else of value.  My cameras and computers and T.V. sets and jewelry were all easily within
 his reach yet he dragged an 800 lb. gun safe which was full into another room to try and get it open.  He did very little to damage my home but he dumped drawers, we think to try to find the combination to the safe when he couldn't get it open in ways that had worked for him before.  He wanted money.  That is all.

Nothing that has happened is worth living in fear.  I now have a new alarm system and new dead bolts.  They do make me feel more safe and comfortable.  Nothing like being broken into to get you same day service.  I have now learned to be more careful when walking into my home.  It didn't register for a couple of minutes even though the safe was sitting on it's back in the middle of my family room.  I have learned thre are things you should and shouldn't do because he was probably in our house when we came in the driveway.

I have learned to do what you can to make yourself safe, then trust in the Lord to lead your life where it should go.  Bill is alive today because of how everything lined up exactly right for him.  I have learned from that.  Ken and I are safe and lost nothing of value because we were being watched over.  I have learned from that.  I have learned from this experience, again, that I have everything that is important.  My house was empty a lot then full of security people, policemen, family and friends, children and laughter in the last few days.  I think most about the children and laughter.  Do not be afraid.  Most people in the world want to be good.  Most people in the world ARE GOOD.  There is much to find joy in!!!  I love you.

P.S.  Had the man gotten into the safe, he would have found things of value.  That is where we keep genealogy books, family records and cd's of pictures of our family to protect them from fire and water etc.  They are the things that hold real value for us.