Mom Again

Being present for mom's transition to another world was one of the most interesting experiences of my life.  We knew the end of this life was pretty close because of all the materials and help we had received from hospice.  They were absolutely great.  I chose to spend every minute I could of those last two weeks with mom.  She went from fairly coherent to a state that was somewhat like a coma in those two short weeks.  As I said, I had read all the hospice materials and mom pretty much followed the pattern.  She stopped eating and drinking, lost interest in pretty much everything and slowly went to sleep.  All my kids and grandkids came to say goodbye which resulted in one of the most precious photographs I own.  It is of my 3 year old granddaughter with her head in my mom's lap and 3 sets of hands loving her, her mom's mine and my mom's.  It is such a tender picture.

The day before mom died I was sitting with her when she suddenly sat up and asked for food.  My daughter was sitting with her too and so I immediately went looking for something to give her.  It took a few minutes and by the time I returned, she was back to sleep.  Later that day, as my husband and daughter were sitting with her, they told me how she sat up in bed and began to vigorously wave to someone in the upper right corner of the room.  I was in the other room talking to the hospice minister.  As I walked into her room, she put her arms out to me, told me how much she loved me and repeatedly hugged me as if she was really excited to see me.  I continue to feel that it wasn't me she was hugging.  I think she was hugging the physical me that she thought was someone else.

She died on a Sunday about noon with all of her children present.  I walked in as she was taking one of her last breathes.  My husband had just told her it was okay to go home.  I told her that dad had been waiting for her a long time and she needed to go to him and she was gone.  It was a peaceful experience for me to know that she had finally gone home.  I have no regrets about the time I spent with her.  It was an amazing experience for me.  Thanks again mom for teaching me another lesson.  When it is time for me to go home, I think I will able to do it peacefully.